Fellowship & Encouragement: The Care of Community, an Essay
On several occasions, I've been asked, "Why do you get so involved, excited, and committed in Women In Fellowship and Encouragement? or " How is it that you never get tired of pursuing other sisters?" My answer though almost always like a reflex is," Living in a community that provides fellowship and encouragement is vital to christian living/" Having people to hold me accountable, and visa-versa is a key component to thriving as a woman of God. Now, the reality of that statement, has had it's development of growth as I have had to care for it, nurture it and commit it to the Lord's plan and will.
See, our culture is one that promotes isolation. Oh! that is a bold statement your are making, one may assert, but it does. We have been all informed by our culture to attain the best, be the best, out compete everyone around us and then enjoy life at the top of the heap. Well, the truth is, after pushing and prodding everyone, so you can be at the top, a harsh reality sparks,"IT'S OFTEN LONELY AT THE TOP". Even in the kingdom of God's children that ideology seeps in, and steals our level of connectedness o one another. I have heard comments such as" he/she/they are too high maintenance," or " I can't be bothered with people," or "he/she/they always want something," and still, "I don't have the time or energy." All these thoughts are apart of a culture that gives us the green light on the "me, myself and I" philosophy!
However, I have always loved the teachings and examples I saw around me growing up as a kid in Jamaica. As poor and as "third world" as we have been labelled, I think the innate sense of sharing, giving to one another and living life together has been a rich and enduring legacy. Biological families lived close in proximity sharing every aspect of life, the good , bad and ugly. If you were a stranger, you could find refuge in knowing people we not scared to share what they had, as a matter of fact Jamaicans are known for adopting strangers as "fambly" or family once they entered established communities. This sense of connection to people, and inviting people had even a deeper reach in the small churches around the community. Fellowship among brothers and sisters transcended biological ties and bonds, they were knitted in Christ.
So, imagine my disappointment in my adult years, more so than teenage years of my transition from Jamaica to the United States. In my adolescent years, transitioning was my only goal. Meeting friends, finishing high school, and learning an entirely new way of life was optimal then; however, as an adult, wife, mother, and Christian, I have found it more challenging to connect with people...even Christians. Everyone lived such closed lives. They tell what they want to tell, they get together on appointment, no one borrows "an egg or a cup of sugar ", and the the idea of community is downsized to the concept of respecting each other's privacy. Hence, now you may understand why I said my passion for being my "sister's keeper" had to be cultivated and nurtured. Living in a culture that does not regard privacy over community can quickly draw us all into that thinking. Community means exposure, transparency. It means accountability to one another for the building of a better and stronger community. It means bearing each others burdens as life plays out. (Gals. 6:2)
In my seventeen years of being saved and living life as a Christian , I have experiences of both the joys of living in a vibrant and biblically sound environment, as well as the spiritual deficiency of not having brothers or sisters to truly live out the journey of living upright before God. Even though for all my saved life I have been nestled in the church community, in the early years of ministry life, I was quickly assigned to the duties of the church. I might add, it was a glorious delight. I was zealous for my new found love, and was happy to do whatever was needed to serve the body of Christ.
Yet, with all the zealousness and commitment to service, there was no one I could unload on. By "unload", I mean share my frailties, my fears, solicit prayers and confess sin. I believe now that, there are various factors that contributed the lack of connectedness to a community that made itself to truly bearing each others burdens, and holding each other accountable. A few of those factors ranged from fear of man, self sufficiency, pride,our past encounters in church settings to plain disobedience to God's word. Consequently, in environments where these factors are pre-eminent, we find ourselves dealing on the surface with each other. We only deal with what we see, and /or hear...no one dare to go deeper in accountability or fellowship. When this happens we deny ourselves the glorious treasures that offered us in the rich body of Christ. (Acts 2:42-47)
On the other hand, when we find ourselves in a vibrant, open, warm and encouraging environment where dwelling in community is premier it is an intoxicating experience. It overwhelms you, and it can even intimidate you because it catches you off guard. As human beings created in the image of God, we operate best when we connect with others in community. Through the scriptures we signaled to the benefits of living in community. We have been charged with praying for one another at all times in the Spirit (Eph 6:18), we also have been herald to "Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results. (James 5:16) How is all this done? It happens in community. In relationships where individuals are not ashamed to be transparent. Where we invite ourselves into each other's lives and say to each other I will stand with you, walk with you, as I know you will with me! It's going against the norms of living in seclusion, where privacy is respected but not premier. It's making ourselves available to be available to help a brother or sister if he falls. The bible says it's the job of the righteous to restore him/her. Guess what? We can only restore one another if we are involved in our brothers and sisters' lives in and out of season. Well, newsflash, we need each other! We cannot live this life outside of a community of faith, support and biblical accountability. The Lord, designed us to love and desire him wholeheartedly, but he also created us to not live alone, he gave us each other. In community we experience a the grace an mercy of God, but we get the opportunity to also be a mean of grace to others.
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